The Pagan Path

Those who wonder are not lost; they are trying to awaken! 'The Sleeper must awaken!'

Monday, April 10, 2017

Destiny's Dilemma

Sarah's mother, when Sarah was merely a dream, was in the process of growing up in a very rural area. Destiny had always felt, from the Time she became aware, that she didn't quite belong. The area she grew up in offered everything necessary for the rearing of a good, healthy body; fresh air, plenty of sunshine, wholesome, home-grown food & a family that loved her. But Destiny wanted more!

Sarah's grandmother had been married to a farmer at a relatively early age & so Destiny grew up in a house of Love, though it was not as she might have wished. She knew, in her innermost being, that her family loved her, but 'damn', they sure had a strange way of showing it. Her older brother, on the other hand; she was pretty sure that he held no love for her. He was always pestering her to 'try harder', as if whatever she endeavored or accomplished wasn't good enough!

Destiny's parents weren't much better; being the super-strict religious types, they were always on her case to 'do better', 'don't do that', 'stay away from THOSE kind of people'! Suffering under such conditions, as she did, she looked forward to the day when she would be able to leave it all behind. Well before her 18th birthday, Destiny had run away from home, unsuccessfully I might add, numerous times. Because of the stranglehold, as she felt it was, that her overbearing parents had on her, she had never made it further than across state lines. Back she came, dragging her feet, but more determined then ever to 'try harder' & 'do better' next escape, that is!

Several years later, the day before her 18th birthday, with little but the clothes on her back & with her thumb perpetually stuck out. Destiny set out on her own for the promise of glory in parts unknown! Through many hardships & trials, she finally reached what she thought was the proper destination, a place more worthy of her exalted status than the little podunk town she had grown up in. The city she decided to rest her travel-weary bones in was by no means the largest, but coming from such a small, rural area, as she did, Destiny believed it to be, with all the entertainment value anyone could ask for & endless opportunity for adventure!

The 'adventure' that Destiny had been waiting for her whole, short life had finally come to fruition, but it proved to be a much different manifestation than the Glory she had envisioned. She was forced to seek shelter right away because, not being a careful planner, Destiny had forgotten that her birthday was during one of the coldest times of the year, dead-winter! Even though the area she had chosen to settle didn't get all that cold, when compared to where she had spent her formative years, during the winter months especially, it rained pretty much every day & was quite chilly; the moisture seemed to eat right into her bones!

Destiny was very attractive ( that was her primary achievement ), so when she got to the big city, it wasn't too difficult to get what she wanted, for a price of course. After such a long time on the road ( it was only about a week or so, truth be told ), Destiny was willing to do just about anything to stop running & settle down for a bit. The problem was that she had to do some things that, in her former life, would have landed her in a world of hurt!

For a time, Destiny felt like she was enjoying her Time in the Big City; she was feeling loved, having the fun she'd always felt she was missing & the doors to ecstasy that she'd always known were waiting for her out there somewhere were opening up all around her! Compared to the life she had known previously, Destiny was living on the edge-a place she'd always suspected existed, but was never allowed to seek out. Up to this point in her bodily existence, Destiny had never experienced such freedom. On the other hand, she had never experienced such pain & with every new one, she was learning how un-prepared she really was to make her way through this world.

Sarah's mother was learning that Life was like a bed of roses, very beautiful under the right circumstances, with the proper care, but full of thorns under all that beauty; if not careful, she would prick herself & things could get ugly very quickly! As she began to learn the ins & outs of Life in the Big City, Destiny found that the rose-colored glasses she had been used to looking at life through tended to hide some of the darker, uglier aspects. Before long, she found herself rather missing the security she had suffered & labored under in her former life. The family she had left behind became an almost fond memory as Destiny was forced to accept the reality she had chosen, ready or not.

In the following years, Destiny found herself face to face with many choices that she didn't feel up to, but they were here choices & make them she must! The 'love' she felt she had missed out on for all of her former life ( especially from her older brother ), she had found in this strange new world, but the price for such 'love' was higher than she'd ever expected; the sacrifices she'd had to make, the things she had to suffer to find & keep that 'love' { the first of many ) took a toll on her body, the like of which she had never known!


Destiny's Story is all too familiar! Many young women & men have left the comfort & shelter of home to seek their fortunes elsewhere, in search of something more. This story is total fiction, but Destiny's Dilemma is not a strange one; the hardships & trials she suffered are not new to many of my readers, either directly or indirectly. It is my wish, that through her story, others may be able to find their way in this world without suffering as she did. Life, as our 'heroine' began to discover, is more than our experience in mere physicality, in this biology! Life consists, not in what we experience in this world, but, as Destiny would have realized, if only she'd been able to quiet her mind sooner, in how we choose to be, to manifest, in our innermost being.

Charles Haddon Shank

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